Great news Rowers! Our very own Greek God and the seed that has inspired our Trees of Life to grow "higher than soul can hope or mind can hide" (E.E Cummings, not as great as Mr. Rowe but still pretty quotable), has entered and taken home the gold in the Olympic Selfie Contest! Mr. Rowe is known for many o' things: naked skydiving, birthing baby octopi, swimming in gelatin filled pools, and most importantly filling us, his fans, with purpose and an endless abyss of emotions. However, none of these compare to his latest and greatest feat! Conquering the illusive selfie! They said it couldn't be done, and they were right! It couldn't be done by a mere mortal, however our earthly representation of the Platonic form of a human, has done it! (for those of you who don't know what a Platonic form is.... read Plato and stop wasting your time doing anything but reading) I give you the rare and coveted selfie that won Mr. Rowe the gold for America:

notice the technique of the slight eye cross, followed by a wondrous flaring of the nostrils (both earned Mr. Rowe a record breaking combination 6.7 points)! But what really had the Russian judges ogling this photo was his awkward use of frame and angle! Congrats Mr. Rowe from da Crew! May we aspire to create a selfie as awe-inspiring as this. FLAPADOODLEDOO for now my paddling ducklings!